Parenting Consulting and Coaching

Anne Janai

Anne Janai, MLA
Clinical Psychology

I offer parenting consulting and coaching to typically developing parents and parents with high-functioning autism. During sessions, we talk about the difficulties you are facing and I walk you through finding solutions that work for you and your family.

Children are born without instruction manuals. All of us need support figuring out how to raise them. Parents with high-functioning autism have the added disadvantage of not having easy cognitive access to their children’s perspectives, and, consequently, their children’s emotional and developmental needs. Without easy information about children’s perspectives and emotions, parents with autism can become confused and frustrated when their parenting efforts don’t yield the results they would like.

I use my understanding of family dynamics, child development, optimal parenting and the cognitive differences between typically developing people and people with autism to help parents with autism get better results and build deeper relationships with their children.

And I use my understanding of all of the above to help typically developing clients get the same.

Almost all of us want better parenting results and deeper relationships with our children.

I keep in mind my clients’ neurological understanding of social dynamics, emotions and family dynamics during sessions and as I support my clients on their parenting journeys. I understand that my clients with autism will have different insights about parenting than my typically developing clients because of their different brains. We begin from there and work towards improving relationships.

In mixed-neurological divorce, I recommend parenting consulting and coaching from someone who understands autism to both parents. This costs far less and does far more to support and build your family than paying attorneys to fight.

Children are always the victims of high-conflict mixed-neurological divorce. Attorneys are the only ones who really benefit. The family money should go to supporting the children, not lining attorneys’ pockets. I urge all parties to stop paying attorneys to fight and to come to better resolutions for the sake of your children.

The hardest pill I ask people with autism to swallow is my belief that in most (but not all!) cases, primary parenting responsibility should belong to the typically developing parent after divorce. I say this with full acknowledgment and recognition that people with autism generally have great love for their children and may feel like my stance unjustly discriminates against them because of their disability.

I do not believe that my position is a position of hate or that I am guilty of hate speech. Theory of mind skills and immediate empathy do much to help typically developing parents understand children’s needs. So, I believe my position is one of prioritizing to the needs of children — both typically developing children and children on the spectrum — over the needs of adults.

Yes, I love and care about my adult clients on the spectrum — just like I love and care about my adult typically developing clients. And at the same time, I believe your children’s developmental needs are more important than the needs of either of the adults in your family.

Children can become very confused and hurt when a parent doesn’t understand their emotions or perspectives. This can happen a lot when a parent is on the autism spectrum. Parenting consulting and coaching can help both parties get better at one of the hardest tasks of life.

Parents on the autism spectrum who are most likely to benefit from parenting consulting and coaching are those who can acknowledge 1) that people with autism have strengths and weaknesses, 2) that typically developing people have strengths and weaknesses AND 3) that some of the weaknesses of autism make parenting harder. I am here to support people with autism who are ready to acknowledge that their autism affects their social relationships — including their social relationships with their children.

There is little I can do to support people with autism who believe that my position means that I am guilty of hate speech. If you have autism and you believe that my position in favor of children over adults means I am guilty of hate speech, my support will not be of much value to you.

If you believe I can be of assistance to you and your children, please use the Calandly app below to schedule a free 30-minute introductory call.

Much love,

Anne

If you are in need of therapy or a diagnosis of any kind, please contact your medical provider.